Joey Barton got himself sent off in the 32nd minute of QPR’s visit to Hull for punching Tom Huddleston in the penis. And that might be the least shocking sentence ever written.
He had been shown a yellow card in each of his last seven Premier League matches, so perhaps Barton was under the impression that the Premier League has a rewards promotion where if you collect seven consecutive yellows, you get a free shot at an opponent’s privates. Or maybe he’s just awful. Or maybe both.
8 – Joey Barton has been shown a card in each of his last eight PL appearances (7 yellows, one red). Anger.
— OptaJoe (@OptaJoe) February 21, 2015
Oh, and by the way, Barton was wearing the captain’s armband when he did this, begging the question, “What type of lunatics must you have in your squad to think that Barton is the best choice for captain?” Despite being a man down, Charlie Austin still managed to equalize for QPR just seven minutes later, but Hull went on to win 2-1. After the match, Barton tried to explain that punching a dude in the dick isn’t malicious.
Young kid making his debut has made a good tackle. Couple of Hull players trying to get him sent off. My job as captain is to protect him. — Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) February 21, 2015
I’ve tried to prevent Hull’s players influencing referee as u can see by me pushing Bruce away.
— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) February 21, 2015
My actions towards Huddlestone were certainly not malicious, it was a stupid reaction to being barged but I can appreciate it wasn’t right. — Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) February 21, 2015
I’m gutted I got sent off. I’ve let my teammates down today and being someone who puts the team above everything else I’m gutted about that.
— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) February 21, 2015
Clarification: Joey Barton is actually someone who puts team above everything except junk jabs.
I’ve apologised to the lads and would like to apologise to all QPR fans who travelled today. — Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) February 21, 2015
This has been the Dirty Tackle of the Day: a chronicling of unfortunate events.