Author: Brooks Peck

Arsenal unveil new home kit with strange press release

They make it way too easy

(Arsenal)

I get it. Trying to come up with something exciting and new to say about the annual kit releases is hard. In Arsenal’s case, you really just want to say “It’s red with white sleeves, it’s way too tight, and you’ll probably be disappointed by who is actually wearing it this season,” but you can’t say that. Instead, Puma and Arsenal came up with this poetic oddity:

That’s real. See for yourself. They also included some strange videos, like this one:

Why do Arsenal do this to themselves? Aren’t there enough jokes about them already? The intensity of their masochism is unmatched in world football.

Francesco Totti had a weird idea for his final match with Roma

It’s a good thing they weren’t awarded a penalty with him on the pitch

(AS Roma)

A lot of thought and planning went into Francesco Totti’s final match with Roma, but according to teammate Juan Jesus, the captain kept changing his mind on the decision in the days leading up to his farewell. He even formulated an insane strategy if he had the chance to take a penalty in the match.

From ESPN FC:

“He was nervous all week,” Jesus told Porto Alegre-based station Radio Atlantida. “One day he would say, ‘I’m quitting,’ and the next he would be, ‘I’m going to keep playing.’ Before Roma-Genoa, we all got together in the dressing room and he said, ‘If I get a penalty, I won’t score it, I’ll kick the ball into the Curva [Sud].’

“There wasn’t a penalty so instead he sent an autographed ball into the Curva after the game. Totti is a fantastic person and he deserves far more than just that party. He’s somebody who helps those in need a lot, without anybody needing to know about it.”

Now, it’s important to remember that this match had serious implications for Roma behind Totti’s sendoff. They were still battling Napoli for second place in Serie A and an automatic place in the Champions League group stage. They only won that decisive match against Genoa by a 3–2 margin on a Diego Perotti goal in the 90th minute. So Totti blasting a penalty into the stands in this situation would’ve been absolutely bananas.

And people thought John Terry orchestrating a guard of honor upon his substitution in the 26th minute of his final (far less meaningful) match was crazy.