Any professional footballer will tell you that the most coveted magazine cover to land is the British Hen Welfare Trust’s Chicken & Egg. You haven’t really made it until you’re the face of a publication that holds seasalt competitions. Sadly, that rules out the likes of Cristiano Ronaldo, Lionel Messi, and even Pele.
Some fans get upset when players decide to swap shirts at halftime, but I think it’s fair to say that an involuntary undressing during a match is far worse.
On a corner kick during a Leicester’s 1-0 win against Crystal Palace, Scott Dann pulled Robert Huth’s shirt clean off his body. And yet, the referee didn’t think there was any problem with it, despite the Leicester defender’s protests.
From the man who brought you the fourth place trophy concept comes a new thesis of defeatism that’s sure to provide Arsenal fans with zero comfort after losing to Barcelona in the Champions League. A club Wenger says are “more beatable than ever before.” Seriously.
From ESPN FC:
“Maybe the Premier League has become the Champions League for English teams. Because every game is so difficult in the Premier League that maybe we suffer a bit in Europe,” Wenger said. “Barcelona can walk through their games before they play against us. They played on Saturday afternoon with a team that after 20 minutes was 3-0 up. … They can select a little bit how much they go for it. In the Premier League you cannot.”
If a Premier League club had Lionel Messi, Neymar, and Luis Suarez at their disposal, maybe they could walk through their games, too.
But yes, Arsene, the reason Arsenal haven’t gotten past the Champions League round of 16 in seven years is because Watford might be better than Espanyol and not because your injury plagued team consistently underperforms while you hoard more cash than any other club in the world.
If Spurs finish ahead of Arsenal this season, look for Wenger to say something even lamer like “everyday we’re alive is like finishing in first place.” Might as well call him the limbo king because he keeps pushing that bar lower and lower.
Claudio Ranieri has gone from being someone many people thought would be the first Premier League manager sacked this season to inspiring his team to an improbable, pizza inspired title run in his first year on the job. And now he has the greatest nickname in the game.
The endless pursuit of official club YouTube content has driven Spurs to the extreme of having Kyle Walker and Dele Alli play a “game” in which they hold their hand on a device that gives them an electric shock when they lie. This almost certainly violates U.K. labor laws, but it didn’t stop them from doing it.
The boys managed to go without a shock until Alli was asked who the best defender on the team is. His mouth said “Kyle Walker,” but the shock said “Toby Alderweireld.”
Stay tuned next week when Spurs TV has Harry Kane and Hugo Lloris play Russian roulette.
Charlton Athletic beat Middlesbrough 2-0 on Sunday, but the win wasn’t enough to pull them out of the relegation zone in the Championship, nor did it change the feelings of supporters on the current state of the club.
Watford beat Arsenal 2-1 in the FA Cup sixth round, ending the Gunners’ run of 15 consecutive victories in the tournament, which has brought their only trophies in the last two seasons.
Diego Costa’s unexplainable run of never having been sent off as a Chelsea player came to an end in their FA Cup loss to Everton and it happened with a tribute to Luis Suarez.
Following brief stints as the divisive replacement to Jose Mourinho (twice!) and Carlo Ancelotti, Rafa Benitez has finally found a job where he can be considered a breath of fresh air rather than a colossal mistake. By replacing colossal mistake in his own right Steve McClaren at 19th-place Newcastle.
It’s been a nightmare season for Sunderland. Their dismal performance on the pitch has been one thing, but Adam Johnson’s pedophilia trial and the subsequent resignation of the club’s chief executive this week has cast an unusually dark cloud over the relegation threatened side. Something had to be done to counterbalance all this negativity. So they’ve signed one of the most joyful forces in the game: the one and only Emmanuel Eboue.
