Former Man United and current Sunderland manager David Moyes sits beside former Sunderland and current England manager Sam Allardyce and former Man United manager and current Man United executive Sir Alex Ferguson during Wayne Rooney’s testimonial at Old Trafford.
Juventus paid €90 million for Gonzalo Higuain — the 28-year-old destroyer of Lionel Messi’s dreams and Serie A’s top scorer last season. This is a lot of money for any player, let alone one who is closing in on 30 years old. And so it has prompted the indignant question raised every time there is a transfer fee larger than what is currently accepted to be within the always rising range of normality: Is he worth it?
Rooney: Is this an energy drink?
Dear Leo,
First, I hope this letter reaches you. I didn’t know if I should send it to your house or the prison in Barcelona, so I’ve sent copies to both just to be sure.
Hello, Pep. I am Zlatan. Welcome to your worst Zlightmare.
A pair of underwhelming performances to start Euro 2016 earned Raheem Sterling a place on the bench and an excessive amount of criticism both from the press and social media. This has left the 21-year-old Man City player suffering a crisis of confidence. According to the Guardian, incoming City manager Pep Guardiola made a point to call Sterling in an effort to lift his spirits and reassure him in the midst of a difficult period. The following is a transcript of that conversation.
I’m Ronaldo. Barry Ronaldo. Cristiano Ronaldo’s identical twin brother. Since everybody always thinks I’m him, sometimes Cristiano lets me take his place so he can have a break from his crazy life. You probably think that sounds like fun, but it’s not because everything always goes wrong for me. For example, I recently mistook a tube of hemorrhoid cream for toothpaste and just this morning I forgot my online banking password as well as the answers to all my security questions for it.
Well. Well. Well.
Look who is in the Copa America Centenario semifinals. Since some people in this country have trouble recognizing good things that are right in front of their faces, I will tell you: It’s me. Jurgen Klinsmann. Managerial genius. And the wonderful team I put together and expertly guided to victory.
AHHHHHHHHHHH I AM ARTUR BORUC AND THIS IS MY EURO 2016 PREVIEW THAT I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHY I’M DOING!!!!!!! I WILL TELL YOU THINGS ABOUT EVERY TEAM IN THE TOURNAMENT SO YOU CAN HAVE SOMETHING TO READ BEFORE IT BEGINS OR BETWEEN THE MATCHES OR ANY OTHER TIME WHEN NORMAL PEOPLE ARE HAVING DANCE BATTLES WITH SQUIRRELS!!!!!!!
