Tag: Antonio Conte

Fabregas swears on TV, Conte gets soaked, and all the madness of Chelsea’s title celebration

Leave it to Diego Costa to take things way too far, though

(Chelsea FC/Twitter)

Chelsea beat West Brom 1–0 with an 82nd-minute goal from forgotten man Michy Batshuayi, who entered the match just six minutes earlier, to seal their fifth Premier League title and sixth top-flight title in club history. The fact that Batshuayi, who hasn’t started a match all season and hadn’t scored a Premier League goal since AUGUST, scored the title-winning goal serves as a nutty twist to an ending that has been clear for months now. But that was just the beginning of the madness that took hold once the final whistle sounded.

First, Cesc Fabregas said “Football is fucking unbelievable” on live, internationally broadcast television in reference to Batshuayi scoring the decisive goal and Gary Cahill’s delicate ears could not handle that.

Then Diego Costa attempted to give John Terry a colonoscopy right there on the pitch.

But after a full season of Antonio Conte jumping on every man, woman, and child within 17 miles of him, it was time for his players to return the favor and bring the party to him. They began by waiting for him in the dressing room and absolutely drowning him in ice water and champagne, which he expertly sucked down.

Then Terry, Costa, and David Luiz stole him away from his press conference so the celebrations could continue.

Though Chelsea’s last title was just two seasons ago, the pain and frustration of last season’s shameful 10th-place finish clearly fueled their celebrations at the Hawthorns. And if his track record is any indication, the celebrations have only just begun.

Want more Dirty Tackle? Listen to the Dirty Tackle podcast!

A very hungry Antonio Conte politely asks a journalist for a bite of his cake

Managers gotta eat, too


Beating Leicester City 3–0 and fending off questions about Diego Costa’s absence is enough to make anyone work up an appetite, so when Chelsea manager Antonio Conte sat down for his post-match press conference and spotted a journalist eating a piece of cake, he couldn’t resist.

First Conte asked if it was good and expressed his jealously before working up the nerve to ask for a bite, which he was granted.

It was an adorable moment and will hopefully result in someone leaving Conte his own piece of cake at each of his press conferences from now on.


Antonio Conte convinces Roman Abramovich to buy new players by murdering all the old ones

b7g549s

Frustrated by Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich’s reluctance to fund a much needed squad overhaul, manager Antonio Conte has murdered all of his players in order to force Abramovich to bring in new ones.

“Mr. Abramovich and the board were unwilling to make the changes that both I and the previous manager told them were necessary, so now they have to,” Conte told reporters as he removed a blood soaked raincoat. “Simple as that.”

Each of the last two summer windows have had transfer business deemed insufficient to keep pace with the rest of the league by Chelsea’s manager at the time. For Mourinho in 2015, the lack of investment cost him his job despite winning the Premier League title the season before and now Antonio Conte has suffered two losses in his last three Premier League matches, with the latest being an embarrassing 3-0 defeat at Arsenal.

“It was rather easy to eliminate all of the players,” Conte said. “Branislav Ivanovic had the mobility of a cactus, so he was the first to get it. And as soon as I started chopping, Diego Costa pulled out an axe of his own and helped me do it. I didn’t even ask him to. I said, ‘Diego, why do you have an axe in the dressing room?’ and he said, ‘Boss, why do you have an axe in the dressing room?’ We laughed and then we chopped everyone. Actually, Gary Cahill just fell on the axes without us having to do anything. What a mess he is. Now more than ever.”

Conte added that the only player he and Costa spared was captain John Terry because “he is Chelsea’s only reliable defender even though the club didn’t want to renew his contract.”

Abramovich was not immediately available for comment, but it is believed that he will not be pleased with the prospect of having to pay for an entire squad of new, world-class players and to have the away dressing room at Emirates Stadium cleaned.

When asked what he will do between now and the opening of the January transfer window, Conte said, “John Terry and two men with axes will get Chelsea more wins in that time than the other players would have.”

The galvanizing madness of Antonio Conte propels Italy past Spain

Spain dismantled Italy in the Euro 2012 final, winning 4-0 to claim their third consecutive major trophy. Two years later at the 2014 World Cup, both nations made shocking exits in the group stage with one win and two losses each. At this point, Spain decided to stay the course with the firmly entrenched and historically successful Vicente Del Bosque, but Italy made a change, replacing Cesare Prandelli with Antonio Conte. And two years after that, Italy have now beaten Spain 2-0 in the Euro 2016 round of 16. And this reversal of fortunes is largely down to the men in the technical area.

Read more