Chelsea’s defenders couldn’t agree on how to contain Liverpool’s Raheem Sterling in the firs leg of their Capital One Cup semifinal, so they decided to try out a few different things. For example, John Terry went with a fun new game called “surprise wrestling” in which he and Sterling formed some kind of malformed human centipede.
Tag: Chelsea
Leo Messi says he has “no intention” of leaving Barcelona, ruins everything for rumor merchants
First, Barcelona had to go and disrupt the storyline of “Barca are over (for real this time!)” by beating Atletico 3-1 with goals from Neymar, Lionel Messi AND Luis Suarez. Then, after the match, Messi ruined the most pervasive story of the January transfer window by going on Barca TV and stating unequivocally that everything printed about him simultaneously trying to leave the club and run it as an iron-fisted dictator is total bullshit.
Several likely explanations for Lionel Messi following Chelsea on Instagram
Lionel Messi’s official Instagram account is now following Chelsea FC’s official Instagram account. This is somehow both important news and evidence of something. Since everyone remembers when Messi followed Manchester City on Instagram in March of last year and then immediately joined the club and won 17 trophies with them, including the World Series of Rugby, before returning to Barcelona and pretending it never happened.
Obviously, there are a number of perfectly reasonable explanations for Messi’s sudden interest in Chelsea’s official social media presence. These are a few.
If it continued… (Spurs v Chelsea)
Spurs gave Chelsea a surprise by coming back from 1-0 down to win 5-3 at White Hart Lane on the first day of the new year. A brace from 21-year-old Harry Kane made him the star as Jose Mourinho stewed in his own conspiracy theories and Chelsea’s defending failed them miserably. This made for a rowdy match and demands that we ask the all-important question: “What if it continued?”
Conspiracy Theory: Opposing teams actively trying to beat Chelsea
Thanks to Jose Mourinho’s bold commitment to exposing the truth, we have already established that ball boys are conspiring against Chelsea. And after last weekend’s controversy in which Cesc Fabregas was booked for diving when he should have been awarded a decisive penalty in Chelsea’s 1-1 draw at Southampton, he has now revealed that the club’s list of enemies extends far beyond a few snot-nosed kids with complete, unchecked control of the flow of balls onto the pitch.
John Terry scores against Chelsea’s U-8 team
Chelsea’s first team took on the club’s U-8 squad in a festive kickabout at Cobham and John Terry did to them what he did to West Ham a few days later: scored easily.
West Ham’s Twitter account trolls Jose Mourinho with “19th century football” photoshop
PIC: The West Ham United team coach (and horse) has arrived at @chelseafc for today’s game #19thcenturyfootball pic.twitter.com/qC9FbEvsQX
— West Ham United FC (@whufc_official) December 26, 2014
When Jose “I’ll park the bus whenever I want” Mourinho described West Ham’s performance in last season’s 0-0 draw at Stamford Bridge last season as “19th century football,” it made people’s heads cave in under the weight of the hypocrisy.
Arsenal fans unappreciative of Chelsea Christmas tree outside the Emirates
A Chelsea fan YouTube channel tried to spread some holiday cheer by bringing a tree and all the trimmings to Emirates Stadium and asking the locals to help them decorate it.
DTotD: Cesc Fabregas runs over unsuspecting referee
Chelsea beat Derby County 3-1 in their Capital One Cup quarterfinal with help from another fine performance from Cesc Fabregas, who seemed to be just about everywhere during the match. Referee Jonathan Moss found this out the hard way. Read more
DT Exclusive: Jose Mourinho responds to Alan Pardew’s claim that Arsene Wenger is better than him
In a recent defense of Arsene Wenger, Newcastle manager/troll king Alan Pardew declared that the Arsenal boss ranks higher than Jose Mourinho on the list of the best manager in Premier League history (all 22 years of it!). Though this is not an entirely unreasonable assertion, it is one that Jose Mourinho would almost certainly disagree with. So we asked him. Except, you know…not really.