Tag: David Moyes

David Moyes has everything figured out

An overconfident man with one simple tactic that no one else has ever thought of

(Sunderland/Twitter)

David Moyes celebrated his birthday on Tuesday by revealing a long overlooked secret to footballing success that will surely lift Sunderland out of last place in the Premier League.

Yes, “stop conceding and score more.” Why didn’t he try this sooner?!?!

With insight like this it’s no wonder The Black Cats have achieved so much.

Of course, some misguided souls have been quick to blame Moyes for Sunderland’s abject failure this season, but David Moyes is not one of them. From the Sunderland Echo after their 2–2 draw with West Ham earlier this month:

When asked if he questioned himself when sections of the support turned on him, he added: “I just remember to myself I have the third or fourth best win record in the Premier League.”

That is a downright Sherwoodian statement that conveniently glosses over his stint at Man United and completely leaves out his disastrous spell with Real Sociedad. But that’s exactly the type of confidence you should expect from a man who probably tells cab drivers that they’ll reach their destination faster if they press down on the pedal harder.

David Moyes hands out chocolate eggs to journalists at press conference

The Sunderland manager tries to get back in reporters’ good graces on Good Friday


Sunderland manager David Moyes hasn’t faced any repercussions since it was revealed that he threatened to slap BBC reporter Vicki Sparks after an interview. But in a transparent attempt to buy back the affections of the press, Moyes handed out chocolate eggs after his press conference on Friday.

As with everything else about Sunderland these days, the desperation is palpable.


https://upscri.be/16bb19/

“Slap” comment video opens door to David Moyes’ history of misogyny

Evidence mounts against Moyes’ claim that this isn’t the person he is


The last four years have unraveled the once respected reputation of David Moyes. At Man United he became a laughingstock, at Real Sociedad the jokes continued in a second language, and at Sunderland he settled into life as a sadsack. All the while, an undercurrent of pity has softened the unraveling, but that should be evaporating after video has emerged of Moyes attempting to joke about slapping BBC reporter Vicki Sparks when he thought the cameras weren’t rolling after she asked if he felt more pressure having Sunderland’s owner in the stands. This, however, doesn’t mean it definitely will.

By Moyes’ own admission, Sunderland sat on this information for two weeks until it became public, at which point he apologized to Sparks. At a press conference on Monday, he modified the old “not that kind of player” chestnut and claimed “It’s certainly not the person I am and I accept it was a mistake.” This immediately proved to be a dubious statement, though.

Not only did he also blame “the heat of the moment” for his plainly inappropriate comment, but he also threw in a casually demeaning “As I said, I’ve apologized to the girl” when he started to get tired of the questions. And yet, some of the journalists in the room seemed more than sympathetic to his situation.

“You can hear the regret in your voice though, you’re obviously disappointed it happened?” one asked, even though that isn’t even a question.

“One local women’s group is asking for an FA investigation, do you think that’s complete overkill?” led another.

Meanwhile, other newly revealed stories of Moyes’ mistreatment of women reporters in the past complete the rapid dismantling of his claim about this not being the person he is.

Ian Herbert, chief sports writer for The Independent writes:

It was in the 2012/13 season, in Moyes’ Everton days, that a woman had the temerity to ask a question which went against the grain of how he wanted a pre-match press conference to go, during the initial broadcasters’ section of the conversation. Moyes cut her down. There was a very uncomfortable moment, after the cameras and broadcasters had cleared and we got down to the more detailed untelevised discussion, when Moyes tried to break the ice in all-male company with a joke at the now departed woman’s expense. No-one wanted to be impolite but everyone stared at the floor.

That was not the only incident. He lost his temper with another woman journalist towards the end of his Everton time, though it was smoothed over. This correspondent didn’t report any of this, of course — just a reference to the conduct of a “top flight manager” a few seasons later.

ESPN reporter Alison Bender also shared her own experience with Moyes:

The FA will investigate the matter, but the problem here clearly extends far beyond an inept bungler like David Moyes. If he’s making a habit of treating women in the workplace this way, you can be sure others in football are too. And with a stable of male journalists alternating between politely biting their tongues and volunteering excuses to try on, a hostile environment is fostered and maintained.

Had this video not become public, Moyes would’ve been free to carry on threatening to slap any woman who dares to ask him a valid question. And, sadly, that still might be the case, but now no one can say they didn’t know this was happening.


https://upscri.be/16bb19/

David Moyes and his Sunderland players begin new careers at Nissan plant

Finding football difficult, Sunderland reassess their career options

(Sunderland AFC)

Winless through the first 10 matches of their Premier League campaign, embattled Sunderland manager David Moyes and his players went to a local Nissan plant in search of more suitable work.

https://www.gettyimages.com/license/620870328

Duncan Watmore tried to make an extra long straw to go with the cup holders so you don’t have to hold your beverage up to your mouth while driving.

https://www.gettyimages.com/license/620870310

Vito Manone discovered an aptitude for sales.

https://www.gettyimages.com/license/620870344

Seb Larsson was just excited to shake hands with someone who didn’t immediately call him and his teammates a disgrace.

https://www.gettyimages.com/license/620870324

And Paddy McNair made it clear that he would prefer to work for Honda.

https://www.gettyimages.com/license/620870280

As for David Moyes, well, he got invited back for a second interview and has a verbal commitment from Nissan that they won’t hire Jose Mourinho instead of him. So, yeah, it was a pretty good day.


Jose Mourinho and David Moyes are living inescapable nightmares

It’s a good old fashioned sad-off!

Two sad men shake hands in the saddest way possible.

Jose Mourinho and David Moyes are arguably the two saddest managers in the Premier League right now. Mourinho was sent to the stands as his Man United only managed a 0–0 draw with Burnley, leaving them in eighth place while Moyes’ Sunderland remain winless and at the bottom of the table through 10 matches.

As both men have recently revealed, their workplace troubles have bled into their personal lives, creating an unwanted competition to see who’s sadder.

http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/soccer-dirty-tackle/david-moyes-jose-mourinho-set-bar-high-most-201247315.html

Mourinho, who is living an isolated existence in a Manchester hotel (perhaps unsure whether he’ll be around long enough to make buying a home worthwhile) while the rest of his family remains in London, told Sky Sports:

“For me, it’s a bit of a disaster because I want sometimes to walk a little bit and I can’t. I just want to cross the bridge and go to a restaurant. I can’t, so it is really bad.

“But I have my apps and I can ask for food to also be delivered, which I do sometimes.”

Meanwhile, David Moyes told reporters that his team’s record has him in a more literally dark place. From Reuters:

“It’s damning, I agree,” Moyes added. “It does make me feel lousy, and I do. I don’t feel good about it but you’ve got to take it. I probably spend Saturday night, and quite often, in a darkened room somewhere.

“Sunday gets a wee bit better, but not much, and hopefully by the time Monday morning comes, you are ready to go again.

“You’ve got to get it out of the system and you are up and running again. And I’ll do that again on Monday.”

It was just a few short years ago that Mourinho said he felt sorry for Moyes in the midst of a brief and terrible spell at Man United that is turning out to be remarkably similar to what Mourinho himself is experiencing there right now.

(Bleacher Report)

Given their shared misery, they should reach out to one another and no longer suffer in solitude. Help each other through this difficult period. Maybe they could silently Facetime while sitting alone their respective darkened rooms, each occasionally muttering Marouane Fellaini’s name. Or they could make plans to start a new football club together. One without owners who will sack you or players who will let you down. One that never loses and exists wherever your family wants to live. It could revolutionize the game! Then the names Mourinho and Moyes will be beloved and synonymous with success once more! Think how wonderful it will be! And then pay the food delivery guy, apologize for holding him up, and close the door before he can ask why there aren’t any lights on and “Mad World” by Tears for Fears keeps playing on repeat.


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