After enduring a full year in which they were banned from making new signings by FIFA and, as a result of that devastating punishment, only won five major trophies, Barcelona were finally able to resume their transfer market wheeling and dealing with the opening of the January window. So they immediately made up for lost time by signing all of the players. All of them (77 to be exact).
Tag: Dirty Tackle
Adidas not happy with Man United’s style of play, thrilled with their shirt sales
Everyone not named Louis van Gaal is unhappy with Manchester United’s style of play and that includes Adidas, who began a record £750 million deal this season to be the club’s kitmaker. They’ve got absolutely no problem with the sweet, sweet cash they’re generating together, though.
Worst Case Scenario: Zidane’s time as manager of Real Madrid
A little more than two months after he said he wasn’t yet ready for the job, Zinedine Zidane has been named Real Madrid manager with Rafa Benitez getting sacked in the middle of his first season. The continuation of Real Madrid’s constant state of trophy producing turmoil by throwing an inexperienced manager in at the middle of a season is seen by many as problematic. With that in mind, the following is just one iteration of the worst case scenario that might unfold.
Confused Barnet player breaks from the wall, takes other team’s free kick
Anticipation can be a powerful thing. And when the anticipated event doesn’t play out as expected, it can be difficult to adjust on the fly. This is the situation Barnet’s Andy Yiadom found himself in during a League Two match against Northampton Town.
Yiadom was a member of the wall on a Northampton free kick. He was determined to charge the ball and attempt to block whatever Northampton tried to do with it. But when the first player to make a run at it proved to be a decoy, Yiadom found himself in no-man’s land with a decision to make: either keep running past the ball or to kick it and chest bump an innocent bystander. He chose the latter option. This earned him a yellow card.
If you throw ice cream at Frank Lampard, he will catch it in a cup
In an effort to entertain his family during the MLS offseason, NYCFC midfielder Frank Lampard stepped behind the counter at an ice cream shop and caught a scoop of the frozen treat in a cup after it was flung at him by a clerk.
James Rodriguez’s excuses for leading cops on a high speed chase are fantastic
James Rodriguez was followed into Real Madrid’s training complex by an unmarked police car on New Year’s Day after a chase that topped out at 124 mph (more than double the speed limit) that gave him time to think up no less than four excuses for not stopping.
Conspiracy Theory: Rafa Benitez wants to wear Jose Mourinho’s skin
It started innocently enough. Rafa Benitez succeeded his old rival, Jose Mourinho, at Inter in the summer of 2010. After all, there are only so many top jobs in football and there’s a certain logic that says an opening with a club that just won the treble weeks before is impossible for any manager to pass up.
But then, after quickly washing out at Inter and disappearing for two years, Benitez took over Chelsea, the club Mourinho managed when they were direct and frequent adversaries. This was strange. Especially since Benitez had previously said that he wouldn’t work for this club. But, again, there are only so many top jobs and Benitez had to take what he could get in the wake of his swift dismissal at Inter.
Then, after two years with Napoli (perhaps just to throw off the suspicious and put a hiccup in the developing pattern), he somehow fell upward to another one of Mourinho’s former clubs: Real Madrid.
Benitez started both his playing career and managerial career at Real Madrid and it had long been regarded as his dream job, though. A fact that was enough to limit any talk of a dark quest to experience what Jose Mourinho has experienced to jokes and put downs.
Now Benitez is going a step further and saying what Mourinho says, proving beyond a shadow of a doubt that his life’s mission is to wear Jose Mourinho’s skin like some kind of Special Onesie.
If it continued…and thankfully it didn’t (Man Utd v Chelsea)
Manchester United and Chelsea, two clubs with uncertain managerial situations that both exist under the shadow of Jose Mourinho, played a miserable scoreless draw to end the calendar year. Thankfully, the match came to a merciful end that allowed all interested parties to move on with their lives and pursue more fulfilling endeavors. But since we have a masochistic streak here at Dirty Tackle, we feel compelled to ask, “What if it continued?”
Jose Mourinho already being welcomed to Man Utd by scarf vendors outside Old Trafford
Louis van Gaal hasn’t been sacked yet, but that hasn’t stopped the unofficial scarf vendors outside Old Trafford from peddling a new Jose Mourinho/Manchester United (or “UNTED” as the scarf above reads) offering ahead of Chelsea’s visit.
Surely Man United CEO Ed Woodward is kicking himself for not getting this product in the club shop before the knockoffs hit the street.
Let’s just hope Juan Mata doesn’t see these.
Meanwhile, in the wilderness of Sweden…
As most footballers (outside of England) enjoy a relaxing winter break, Zlatan Ibrahimovic searches the snow covered wilderness of Sweden for the fuel that keeps him at the peak of his formidable strength: adrenaline.
Like a shark, he cannot stop moving. Always hunting, whether it be on the pitch or on a snowmobile.
Consider this a reminder that Zlatan is always out there. Ready to pounce. He does not rest.