After a summer in which Man City signed Kevin De Bruyne for £54 million, Raheem Sterling for £44 million, and even Patrick Roberts for £12 million, it was 18-year-old Kelechi Iheanacho, called up after a season in City’s youth setup, who scored the 90th-minute winner against Crystal Palace.
So who is the lesser known match winner standing out from the club’s expensive youthful acquisitions? Let’s take a look…
It took a while to get going, but by the end of Manchester United’s 3-1 win against Liverpool, it felt like we all owed someone some money after watching two spectacular goals in a two-minute span.
Having endured an agonizing spell of two matches without scoring, Cristiano Ronaldo decided to go ahead and score five against Espanyol. He scored his initial hat trick within the first 20 minutes of the 6-0 win, then added two more in the second half for good measure.
Chelsea were all set to win at Everton and get their season on track after the international break. For nine minutes, the Toffees were completely shut down by Chelsea. Had it gone on for just a bit longer, they probably would have quit and handed Chelsea the three points just to avoid further frustration.
But then, in that moment of desperation, Muhamed Besic conveniently “injured his hamstring” and was replaced by Steven Naismith, a player nearly sold on transfer deadline day, who went on to score twice in five minutes and completed his hat trick in the second half. This gave Everton a shocking 3-1 win and Chelsea their third loss in five matches this season.
David De Gea signed a new four-year contract with Manchester United that he almost certainly will not come close to seeing out with them. To mark the occasion, he posed for a few photos with Louis van Gaal. Who, as per usual, made it weird.
Life in Los Angeles seems to be going well enough for Steven Gerrard, but good lord does he miss Liverpool. In an interview with the Daily Mail, Gerrard made it clear that MLS isn’t fulfilling all of his professional desires.
At the end of a manic acceptance speech upon being named Comedian of the Year at the GQ Awards in London, Will Ferrell called out Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho and urged him to “Keep playing defense, man. Keep playing defense.”
“Seven guys in the box — I love it,” Ferrell joked.
Mourinho was the recipient of the GQ Editor’s Special Award, because obviously. Here you can see how thrilled he was to be there…
A lot is made about how modern football has been ruined by mercenaries. The incredibly talented athletes we love to watch are supposedly just doing their jobs for the astronomical sums of money we conspire to afford them. It’s said that they have no passion for the game to which they’ve devoted their lives and sacrificed their futures and hold no loyalty to the employers who demonstrate the same or the fans who are all too eager to turn on them with the weather. This is reason enough to despise and admonish them every chance we get.
If only these footballers truly cared, we say. If only they demonstrated the same passion that we do. Then they would be doing it right.
But as the current fog of idiocy that has surrounded Gerard Pique demonstrates, that’s not true either. In the minds of too many fans and pundits, footballers must live up to impossible and illogical standards and are only allowed to be wrong.
Perhaps inspired by Gonzalo Jara’s violation of Edinson Cavani during Copa America, Velez Sarsfield defender Emiliano Amor got a little too personal with Lanus’ Oscar Benitez during a Copa Argentina match.
After lightly punching Benitez in the kidney several times, Amor gripped him like a bowling ball.
The surprise prostate pinch went unpunished, but Lanus went on to advance on penalties.
This has been the Dirty Tackle of the Day: A chronicling of unfortunate events.
International breaks are a time of intense boredom, even for players. This inevitably leads to weird ideas, like baking a cake for your 10 millionth Facebook fan while wearing a GoPro camera on your head. Which is exactly what Mario Götze did.
The World Cup winner says he’s never baked before, so this was of course a perfect time to start.
Though there are brief cameos from other people, the video plays out like something made by the last man on earth as he attempts to stave off the crushing loneliness of his existence. Highlights include Mario signing “Pat-a-cake, pat-a-cake!” to himself and just the general oddity of watching Mario Götze go through the process of baking a cake for four minutes and 25 seconds. Especially since he actually made a banana bread.
