Tag: Jose Mourinho

Hooded Jose Mourinho attends Spain-Ukraine, possibly creeps out Cesc Fabregas

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Spain beat Ukraine 1-0 to wrap up Euro 2016 qualifying in a match that happened to mark Cesc Fabregas’ 100th cap. Cesc had the opportunity to make the evening a bit more special with a penalty in the ninth minute, but his underwhelming effort was saved.

One possible explanation for Fabregas’ unsuccessful penalty was the fact that Jose Mourinho, his manager at Chelsea, was in the stands dressed as a Sith Lord/assassin from Assassin’s Creed. Looking up and spotting that as you’re about to take a penalty would unnerve anyone, let alone a player who was underperformed this season, contributing to arguably the darkest period of Mourinho’s career.

And if you’re now imagining Jose Mourinho dressed like this and standing in the shadows outside Cesc’s house, so is Cesc.

Jose Mourinho gives seven-minute response to one question after Southampton loss

Jose Mourinho appears to have entered the “final scene of Scarface” portion of his second stint with Chelsea after yet another loss, this time going down 3-1 at home to Southampton. After the match, he worked a medley of his greatest hits into a lengthy response to his interviewer’s one and only question to him.

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Iker Casillas invites Jose Mourinho to a party after Porto beat Chelsea

Hey Jose,

Long time no talk! How about that match, eh? Losing to your old club in the Champions League must feel awful. And the way this season has been going for you must really have you feeling almost as bad as you made me feel when we were together at Real Madrid, the club I had been with nearly my whole life until you made them think I was worthless and they eventually shipped me out to Porto.

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Jose Mourinho would like to make his point about Arsene Wenger being awful again

It’s been a rough week for Arsene Wenger. Though he did get a big midweek win against Spurs in the Capital One Cup, it only came after he lost to Jose Mourinho’s Chelsea yet again last weekend, which was quickly followed by reports of he and his wife getting divorced. So Mourinho has decided to round it out by giving Wenger a familiar kick for not being down enough.

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Jose Mourinho does product placement for Google during press conference

Jose Mourinho is getting pointed questions from journalists and he doesn’t know why. As he says, he is still the champion of England (he — not his club — just him) despite Chelsea’s terrible start this season and others (ahem, ARSENE WENGER) have gotten much softer treatment, in his eyes, over much longer periods of underachievement.

“Some manager can’t be in difficult situations five, six, seven, 10 years and I am the current champion of England, why should I be in trouble?” he asked reporters at his press conference ahead of Chelsea’s Champions League opener against Maccabi Tel Aviv. “Why? I think that’s a good question and you don’t know what to answer.”

He then addressed the issue of what has been dubbed his “third season syndrome” where he either doesn’t stick around for one or underachieves if he does stay in a given job that long. Naturally, he sees this trend quite differently.

“My third season at Porto, I didn’t have a third season,” he said. “My third season in Inter, I didn’t have a third season. My third season at Chelsea the first time, I won the FA Cup and the Carling Cup and I played a Champions League semifinal. The third season in Real Madrid, I won the Super Cup, I lost the cup final, and I went to the Champions League semifinal. These are my third seasons. So click Google instead of make stupid question. Click Google and try to find.”

And it only got better from there. (Watch the video above for the full back and forth with the reporter who raised the issue.)

It’s unclear how much Google paid for this brilliant bit of product placement, but “Click Google instead of make stupid question” is a bold new slogan for the company.

 

Muhamed Besic’s hamstring joins campaign against Chelsea

Chelsea were all set to win at Everton and get their season on track after the international break. For nine minutes, the Toffees were completely shut down by Chelsea. Had it gone on for just a bit longer, they probably would have quit and handed Chelsea the three points just to avoid further frustration.

But then, in that moment of desperation, Muhamed Besic conveniently “injured his hamstring” and was replaced by Steven Naismith, a player nearly sold on transfer deadline day, who went on to score twice in five minutes and completed his hat trick in the second half. This gave Everton a shocking 3-1 win and Chelsea their third loss in five matches this season.

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Will Ferrell urges Jose Mourinho to “keep playing defense, man”

At the end of a manic acceptance speech upon being named Comedian of the Year at the GQ Awards in London, Will Ferrell called out Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho and urged him to “Keep playing defense, man. Keep playing defense.”

“Seven guys in the box — I love it,” Ferrell joked.

Mourinho was the recipient of the GQ Editor’s Special Award, because obviously. Here you can see how thrilled he was to be there…

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Jose Mourinho refuses to apologize for the media’s singling out of Eva Carneiro

Jose Mourinho flipped out when physiotherapist Jon Fearn and first team doctor/assistant medical director Eva Carneiro ran onto the pitch late in Chelsea’s 2-2 home draw with Swansea in their season opener to treat Eden Hazard. Mourinho thought they were impulsively costing the team another player as Chelsea desperately sought a winning goal despite playing with 10 men, since Hazard would have to leave the pitch to be treated once they emerged.

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