An unidentified man came out of the stands and onto the pitch in the 67th minute of Man United 1-0 Europa League win against Zorya. The man wore a full Manchester United kit to try and blend in with the players, but his touches of the ball quickly betrayed that image. Astonishingly, he was still allowed to run around until the end of the match.
After the final whistle, goal scorer Zlatan Ibrahimovic let the clearly envious man touch his hair.
Zlatan Ibrahimovic has apparently become so powerful that he is multiplying. One member of his secret army of clones escaped the containment facility and invaded the pitch during Man United’s match against Leicester in an attempt to unite with Original Zlatan and form a unified Mega Zlatan. Though stewards thwarted his efforts, Original Zlatan was amused by the sight of the man, but clearly wanted him to get lost so as not to ruin their plan for world domination.
“This is my life now…ball man.”
Finally accepting the reality of Wayne Rooney’s struggles, Jose Mourinho benched him for Leicester’s visit to Old Trafford, starting Juan Mata in his place. And Man United went on to score four goals in the first half. Wayne Rooney, meanwhile, was forced to explore a strange new environment to him: the bench.
Heading to Vicarage Road with two consecutive losses, Man United were desperate for a win. Instead, they lost 3-1 — their first loss to Watford in 30 years.
Jose Mourinho has won everything. So now he’s giving the opposite a try. And it’s going really well.
In a match that was treated like a cross between a Champions League final and a UFC event, but was actually just the first scoop of what will inevitably be too much ice cream, Pep Guardiola’s Man City beat Jose Mourinho’s Man United 2-1 in their first Manchester derby against one another at Old Trafford. Though Man United threatened to equalize after falling behind by two goals in the first half, City held on to leave Mourinho with just one win in his last 10 matches against Guardiola. This is only the beginning, but still we must ask, “What if it continued?”
I don’t know if these are real tourists that this Man City fan channel snarkily guided around the outside of Old Trafford, but it was a clever idea for a video, so I don’t really care. Here’s to hoping rival fan stadium tours become an ongoing thing.
With Pep Guardiola’s move to Manchester City to resume his eternal battle with Jose Mourinho, Catalan football satire show Crackovia is producing a series about the two rivals as they now share a city. The first episode spoofs the popular Man City YouTube video that had Guardiola sharing a cab with a young ginger fan and features a depiction of Zlatan Ibrahimovic as a Frankenstein’s Monster type character who can only say “Zlatan.”
Pretty good, Crackovia. Pretty, pretty good.
One might expect a player who has been frozen out and told to find a new club by his employer would retreat into the shadows of social media, but Bastian Schweinsteiger is doing the exact opposite. And it’s becoming uncomfortable for everyone.
WATCH: @paulpogba impersonates @Ibra_official in his interview with @ThierryHenry: https://t.co/AmEPDn0OFk https://t.co/VCVYTg7gCS
— Sky Sports (@SkySports) August 19, 2016
When two superstars with giant personalities are brought together in a new team, there are always concerns about how they will get along both on and off the pitch. Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Paul Pogba have been quick to dispel these concerns at Man United, though. And they’ve already established themselves as football’s greatest comedy team.
